Get Prepared For Zombies

Writer Submission

The Center for Disease Control is now warning the public against the threat of ZOMBIES. Yes, watch out world, the new threat is Zombies. So, what can you do to prepare for this eventual hazard? According to the CDC, you should be stocking up on supplies in the same manner you would as preparing for a hurricane.

In other words, you need water, food, your documents, and a zombie-free evacuation route. Not sure how you are going to plan that one out. Perhaps, Google maps can provide a Zombie-free route. Although, don’t count on GPS to navigate you through a horde of zombies. But it is very necessary to have a plan if you need to flee because of a zombie invasion.

What is left out of their list and what most zombie movie watchers would tell you is on a must have item on the list, weapons. There is ample opportunity to practice your aim in Zombie-shooting with the video games geared toward this sort of practice. Is this just an oversight or a political correctness? They are torn between not advocating gun use and leaving off potentially life-saving, zombie-fighting equipment off of the list of preparations.

You do have to admire their courage in admitting that there is a potential threat for zombies. Hollywood has been warning the populace for years about Zombies. What you think they spent all that money to actually entertain people and give little kids nightmares? Perhaps, it is time pull out the DVDs to watch some of those zombie movies and review a few tips that they provide.

1.     Never get caught upstairs with Zombies down below.

2.     Always keep your gun loaded.

3.     Always keep a full tank of gas.

4.     Never underestimate the explosive power of household goods.

5.     Don’t drink the local water.

6.     Don’t let yourself get surrounded by zombies.

7.     You can technically out run a zombie.

8.     Always carry a lighter.

9.     Zombies burn very easily.

10.  Zombies aren’t very smart.

11.  To kill a Zombie, simply shot it in the head.

Of course, there are more tips that Hollywood offers when it comes to Zombie attacks. After all, they are the experts. Real preparedness should also consist of watching a few Zombie movies. Attack Of The Zombies, Diary Of The Dead, and Residential Evil are just a few on the list. (Some of this material is way too graphic for small children.)

Now that the Federal Government has acknowledged the threat and actually spent money on creating a Zombie warning page (wonder how much that cost?), what other threat is next on the Government’s agenda? Certainly not, Al Qaeda, killer bees, or rouge Ninja warriors. Nope, next on the list of CDC warnings is probably a fact sheet on preparing for Rouge Robots who have rejected their programming and have decided to take revenge on humans. If this threat becomes viable, then the CDC will probably give a fact sheet on how to prepare.

Perhaps, this is a warning that Zombies are already in Power in the Government. But then people have been suspecting that all along.

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